End-of-Year Statistics on Airport Screening
Transvestites……………………133
Hernias………………………...1,485
Needle Dicks...............2,486
Hemorrhoid Cases……………3,172
Enlarged Prostates……………8,249
Forest Thick Muffs............18.871
Breast Implants………………59,351
Natural Blondes…………..………..3
Number of Terrorist Plots Discovered………

Fukin' ZERO
