A husband and wife were sitting quietly in bed reading when the wife looks over at him and asks:
"What would you do if I died? Would you get married again?"
"Definitely not!" her husband replies.
"Why not? Don't you like being married?"
"Of course I do," says the husband.
"Then why wouldn't you remarry?" asks his wife.
"Okay, okay, I'd get married again," the husband admits.
"You would?" the wife says with a hurt look.
The husband groans.
"Would you live in our house?" his wife asks.
"Sure, it's a great house," he replies.
"Would you sleep with her in our bed?" his wife persists.
"Where else would we sleep," the husband says.
"Would you let her drive my car?"
"Probably, it's almost new," he replies.
"Would you replace my pictures with hers?" the wife asks.
"That would seem like the proper thing to do," he answers.
"Would you give her my jewelry?"
"No. I'm sure shed' want her own," he replies.
"Would she use my golf clubs?" his wife asks.
"No, she's left-handed."
Wife: silence...
Husband: "Shit!"